arrBlogEntry[21] = new Array('2005.07.01', 'What a full day! Davis to SF to Oakland. Stephanie and I go to Lucky Juju, which is this place in Alameda with, for donation only, 50\'s and 60\'s and 70\'s pinball machines. Lots of Space machines, some rock stars, Evil Knievel! So cool, it was.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[22] = new Array('2005.07.02', 'Nice bike ride with Dan. I\'m surprised (although it\'s not, Dan tells me, surprising) that I\'m still a bit sore after three weeks. Tiburon is great...', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[23] = new Array('2005.07.03', 'Went wine tasting with Danny Ronen high in the Santa Cruz mountains. Some good wine, and so great to be on a mountain. I look down at the South Bay and, once back to Holland, when am I going to see hills again?', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[24] = new Array('2005.07.03', 'Going on a zombie retrospective, watched Night of The Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead (original), and Dawn of the Dead (30 years updated). They are truly amazing movies, filmed sort of arty and with a lot of social subtext. I liked the recent 28 Days Later, but it\'s not a lot more than an hommage to these great movies.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[25] = new Array('2005.07.04', 'What better thing to do than watch a Zombie movie on July 4? Can you think of something better?', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[26] = new Array('2005.07.06', 'We are housesitting for a lovely couple, Connie and Jason Vela, and their two cats, Phantom and Luna. There\'s also a fish, Lucho, because he\'s quite combative. It\'s great to have a space of our own, as we\'ve been staying a lot with Mrs. Petty, having her walk laps in the house or watch Perry Mason or discuss peach cobbler recipes. There\'s a million enchiladas, and we are lucky to have the Enchilada Warehouse close by.
It\'s hard to drive here. All the big giant cars have W stickers. Whenever a big SUV cuts me off, and it has a W sticker, my hackles are raised.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[27] = new Array('2005.07.08', 'Went to see March of the Penguins. This is the cutest movie ever, a year in the life of Emperor Penguins. During the winter, they keep the egg safe by holding it on the top of their feet as they walk. If it falls, the egg, well, it petrifies.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[28] = new Array('2005.07.10', 'Crash! After AIDSRIDE, I went out today with the San Antonio Wheelmen and promptly bit it on a completely pedestrian turn. I\'ve forgotten what road rash is like, and now I remember. It hurts to sneeze, but mostly it\'s a good reminder that biking can be dangerous, and it\'s better to crash at 15 mph then 45. Despite this, there is absolutely beautiful riding in the Hill Country, as long as you leave before 8am.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[29] = new Array('2005.07.15', 'Riding in Texas is great. Today I rode north, in the gushing rain, until a big fatty fat fat lightning bolt came down a mile in front of me. Then I turned around.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[30] = new Array('2005.07.20', 'I don\'t really know what to say about Texas. It is gorgeous. If only the people didn\'t like their gunracks so much.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[31] = new Array('2005.08.01', 'I haven\'t written about Texas because I\'ve been so in the middle of it. To recap, L and I spent all of July in San Antonio, which is a pleasant enough city, self-monikered as \"Venice of the Americas\". Yeah, uh huh. Mostly I will remember enchiladas, cheap fiction(I guess since no one reads literary fiction here, there\'s lots of remainder stock at the Half Price Books). We went to some amazing ranches, fed bison, ate homemade ice cream, and have a new favorite drink, the Chocolate Martini. I\'d also like to give out some props to Gemini Inc, which is a fabulous and surprising writing organization in San Antonio. Also my mum came by, and she was a super trooper, even though she hurt her back holding on to the inner tube too tightly when we went on the baby rapids. Other things of note:
Sign: God, country, and bobcat football
Sign: Big hair, trucks, and texas longnecks.
', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[32] = new Array('2005.08.01', 'Can you effing believe that Bush pushed Bolton through? Oh, not going to miss that part of America. Road trips, yes. Read an article today on Joel Osteen, who is the head of the largest church in America. 30,000 members. They bought the old basketball stadium in Houston, spent 95 million dollars redoing it, and that\'s where they hold their evangelical services---capacity of 16,000 in the mega-church. whoa.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[33] = new Array('2005.08.08', 'Back in A\'dam, glad to be back. Had to fly from Texas to San Francisco to get to A\'dam, finally sitting in London for 6 hours. If there are no good movies on tv today, I\'m gonna puke.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[34] = new Array('2005.08.10', 'SOTD update: Working on Chapter 7 right now. Had a great connection and workshop in San Antonio with Debra Monroe, a very good author and teacher at South Texas State. So we worked on Chapter One a bit. I\'m also working with an editor to get my query letter/business proposal up to snuff to start sending to agents. Lastly, I\'m trying to figure out how to incorporate the idea of a crucifix made of hot dogs into the text, but this is proving tricky.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[35] = new Array('2005.08.15', 'I\'m happy to be back....and now I\'m starting to work.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[36] = new Array('2005.08.20', 'Some other Texas oddities:
So many screwy tshirts, often worn by people under 10...Sex instructor first lesson free<\/i>
Chick magnet<\/i>
I dream of shopping<\/i>
The way that radio announcers (still) use the words fag and gay to describe anything they don\'t like...
Other lame radio announcements:
Telling someone to go see The Dukes of Hazzard without their girlfriend so they can look at Jessica Simpson, mastubrate with lotion and a hole in a popcorn cup
Camouflage ribbons to support the troops
Bumper Stickers that say W...stands for women<\/i>
And the women who, after having their birthday party, came over to me and gave me the rest of their bonbons...', 'huts.jpg','v', 'r');
arrBlogEntry[37] = new Array('2005.08.21', 'R-, the 17 year old daughter of a friend, comes to stay with us after having spent the last 2 months in South Africa. Coincidentally, I am reading a book of essays by the South African writer J.M. Coetzee. R- tells me that Coetzee worked for the secret service as an informant. I immediately try to corroborate this, but I can\'t. I can\'t find it on the net, and another South African acquaintance doesn\'t think it\'s true either. But what if it is? What does that do to our reading habits? In college, you would often hear a feminist argument that said that you shouldn\'t read Hemingway(for example) because of how he dealt with women, both in his life and in his texts. I never bought that argument. But doesn\'t this raise the stakes a little bit? Is there a social responsibility NOT to read certain work because the work\'s author committed unforgivable acts? To do so, you would be trying to diminish their public, to diminish their place in history, in the canon, by refusing to proliferate their name (via their work). And, to push this, what if their texts take the opposite stance as their life? What if, you have an author that has done terrible things that tries to atone for them via their characters, via their narratives?', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[38] = new Array('2005.08.28', 'It\'s hamsterweek once again in Holland, meaning that you stockpile things before winter comes up. At least I think that\'s what it means. Pictures of little hamsters over all the ads, furry, russet colored. You can also turn hamster into a verb; we gaan hamsteren, to hamster, meaning to stockpile like a hamster.', 'hamster.jpg','', '');
arrBlogEntry[39] = new Array('2005.09.01', 'Does time really keep slippin\' into the future? Cause, like, the second that it slips into the future, it\'s present again, which means it never really reaches the future.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[40] = new Array('2005.09.05', 'I\'m embarrassed to say this, but the terrible disgusting uncouth t-shirts just keep on coming! I know we are all desensitized, but try to imagine what the following text looks like on a t-shirt...
Will Fuck For Coke(buxom woman)
Broken Condom(4 year old boy, I swear!)
What is up with this?', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[41] = new Array('2005.09.05', 'so my thinking is, if intelligent design is true, and we still have things like carbon dating, then the big muscly bearded guy up above is deliberately misleading us.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[42] = new Array('2005.09.06', 'Today is our 7th anniversary. We lay around in bed, looking at all our wedding pictures. We were crying a lot, I feel so lucky to have such great friends, both those I knew then and friends I have met since. Then we read our vows. I was mushy. I\'m really grateful.', 'laura_texas.jpg','', '');
arrBlogEntry[43] = new Array('2005.09.14', 'Lovely few days with my dear friends Allison and Tristen, showing them my evil haunts, truffles, coffee, Belgian Beer, sitting on the balcony for the last days of summer. Now off to Berlin to see my god-daughter!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[44] = new Array('2005.09.18', 'I was mauled by a tiger, I was tied up, I listened to der Zauberflote, I played horse, I read \"Misty on Chincoteague Island\", I played Legos, I played knight, I read Panther, made waffles, I was mauled some more by a magic tiger who could also tie people up, I was bit, I was kissed, I learned to love der Zauberflote and made to feel stupid when I didn\'t know it was Tamina singing, I counted the number of kopfballs Luca could do with his birthday balloon, I watched my god-daughter sleep.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[45] = new Array('2005.09.18', 'An exciting 48 hours in Berlin, as much for my great time with Riva, Luca, and Almut, but also because there was a fantastic literary festival going on and we got to see Robert Hass read for 12 people at a place called Whiskey and Cigars. It was so great to see a wonderful poet, once Poet Laureate, at such an intimate place. I was hoping he would open it up to requests, as two of his poems, one about bees and one about an elevator, have stuck many years in my head, and I remember well the nervous feeling I had 15 years ago when I \"opened\" for him at a poetry reading. There he was, with his strong arm and a glass of red wine, looking strangely out of place next to a charcoal colored iMac, and it was special.
Funny, and ironic, that I could see him with 15 other people and Jonathan Safran Foer was sold out the next evening. On one hand, I suppose I could see it as a win for the foes of American cultural hegemony, this kind of sense that not everything American makes it everywhere else, and nothing against JSF, who is clearly a brilliant novelist, if not someone who uses his wisdom a bit too snarkily, but it\'s funny to see him get a billion people and for Bob to be at a tiny little place. Both clearly deserve the greatest of audiences, and it\'s wonderful to see Robert\'s work in translation.
The irony for me was that, because JSF was sold out, Almut and I went to the Palast Der Republik, which was the GDR parliament building, to see an exhibit of 25 young Berlin artists on the subject of death. Now the exhibit was cool, but the amazing thing was the building itself. First of all, all the small walls were taken out of it, so it\'s nothing but giant halls, concrete with pen marks and graffitti, and old beams. The building has been de-asbestosized and is slated for demolition, so this was one of the last opportunities to view the building. And of course, Berlin is so darn hip, and there were like 1000 hipsters looking at crushed crows and rollercoasters that lead to nowhere.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[46] = new Array('2005.09.24', 'it\'s hard for me to describe Robodock. It\'s an SRL-like festival in this kind of forgotten docklands in Amsterdam Noord. Full of naked people and things blowing up(not the naked people. It was pretty damn amazing. I was really impressed because one of the pieces actually invoked a real sense of danger---there were all these machines in the space and fire and stiltwalkers and you didn\'t know where they were coming from so all of a sudden you felt this heat behind you---
I had so much fun with Tristen and Allison. It\'s funny, it\'s always heartening to have people visit you in your own environment, and to show them what life is like in this part of the world...so props to Allison and Tristen, whom I love dearly.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[47] = new Array('2005.09.27', 'I woke up at 5:30 this morning and Laura was nowhere to be found. She had moved to the other room to escape the mosquito. I wrote this poem in her honor:
the mosquito
that forced you
from the bed
was slow and fat
and after
i killed him
i spit
to wipe his smear
off the wall
i failed as
your protector
i told you
to come back
oh shit there\'s
another one.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[48] = new Array('2005.10.01', 'Weekend in Paris! Nothing but chocolate croissants and quiches and red wine. With dear friends Nicolas and Stefan, we watched, when tired, Star Academy, which is a reality show where they try to make cross-eyed people into pop stars. I want to try out. Went to the Pompidou, which is always amazing. It is a copy of the Beverly Center(oh, right, it was the other way around), with brilliant contemporary work, including Warhol\'s Electric Chair series and an absolutely brilliant Bill Viola video(5 Angels For The Millenium). Wow.
In trips like this, there always seems to be a MOMENT where everything is perfect, or almost. For Laura and I, it was during la nuit blanche, which is sort of like Museumnacht, which is when the museums are open until 3 in the morning and there are events everywhere. We were at the top of the Institut de la monde Arabe, looking out over the city, over Notre Dame, le Tour Eiffel, and all was good in the world..', 'paris.jpg','', '');
arrBlogEntry[49] = new Array('2005.10.02', 'In one Parisian window was this adorable cat, mugging for the digicam, with a sign that said J\'ai m\'appelle Pollock.', 'pollock.jpg','v', 'r');
arrBlogEntry[50] = new Array('2005.10.05', 'October means oliebollen time! Oil balls, like doughnuts, winter is coming!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[51] = new Array('2005.10.06', 'As I read the news this morning, I think, if David Beckham and Ashanti can launch their own fragrances, why can\'t I? Tune in soon for details...', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[52] = new Array('2005.10.08', 'Update: it now appears that Marilyn Manson will also now have his own fragrance. What do you think is in it?', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[53] = new Array('2005.10.12', 'Happy birthday Laura!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[54] = new Array('2005.10.14', 'Milestone: I have finally sent out the first third of Sleep of the Dreamless to an agent in New York. Although nothing may come of it, it is a new step into a good world, and closer to finishing. Yay for me!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[55] = new Array('2005.10.19', 'It happens sometimes, rarely, that I am out with three or four other Americans, and we don\'t even know what\'s happening, but nonetheless it happens, there\'s one person in the group isn\'t a merkin, and she tells us that we\'re talking American, that is, referring to American pop culture. In this case, it was: Bisquick, Charmed, and a pinball machine with Elvira on it. And I had to explain to a 22 year old who Elvira was, and, for a moment, I felt older, but it was fine, I like being older, fine.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[56] = new Array('2005.10.23', 'Okay, so the web site is getting a makeover. I find that I\'m the only person on the planet who likes reading on a black background. So some pages are the new look grey and orange, and I\'m converting the old ones. Thanks to Oguz Buyukberber for coming up with the color scheme. Enjoy!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[57] = new Array('2005.10.27', 'One of those days when I can only see the weaknesses in the book and not the strengths. Problem solved via happy hour at Getto and lots of sugar in the two for one mixed drinks.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[58] = new Array('2005.10.28', 'Event Announcement: I will be giving a reading at The Sugar Factory on Sunday, November 20. Please check out WordsInHere for details. Bring your friends, it will be heaps o fun!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[59] = new Array('2005.11.01', 'Last night, after a fun Electra concert, I went out for drinks with my friend Kai and a few people and Mark Z. Danilewski(sp?), who wrote a fabulous, challenging, and sometimes disappointing book called House of Leaves. It was interesting, as always, to see someone with a bit of fame in action, cracking jokes, giving literary advice, texting his girl.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[60] = new Array('2005.11.03', 'Stayed up til 5:30 with Laura getting ready to go to the US. Then hit by truck, then Laura called at 5 in the morning. Forgot the time zone thing, was eating mole in Berkeley.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[61] = new Array('2005.11.05', 'I have to give props to National Geographic. One night, a documentary on Japanese fighting spiders who duel by trying to wrap each other in cocoons. The next night, a documentary on Harimono, Japanese full-body tattoos. That\'s diversity!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[62] = new Array('2005.11.05', 'Another Museumnacht come and gone, another wild evening. I am haunted by a glass jar filled with squares of skin in formaldehyde---when sailors died and could not be identified, they would cut off their tattoos and hope that family would recognize them...', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[63] = new Array('2005.11.08', 'I have more than once verbalized by distaste for short fiction, but now that I\'m writing it, I\'m actually kind of excited. Imagine what it\'s like to say \"I\'m finished!\" And I\'m excited about what I\'m writing, I won\'t you the subject matter because you will never take me seriously again, but it\'s good, and funny, and I can\'t wait to read it on the 20th.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[64] = new Array('2005.11.09', 'For the first time in fifteen years, I cooked fish in the house. I cooked kabeljauw(affectionately and improperly pronounced cable-jaw) and zeewulf(sea wolf). And it was good, and I didn\'t get ill. But when I came back to the house five hours later, I remember something very important: the house smells like fish, and that, my friends, is not good.
I just went to a concert that premiered a piece by my friend Giel Vleggaar. A successful and moving piece, further complicated that the subject matter is the death of a loved one. And what\'s really hard is separating the critical brain(how the players are playing, etc) from the brain that says, damn, Giel\'s mom is dead, and he\'s representing that in these notes, and that\'s big.
I am eating poffertjes and drinking port in a glass that says \"kikker vindt een vriendje\"(frog finds a girlfriend).', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[65] = new Array('2005.11.11', 'A strange birthday, one I\'ll report on in more detail later, introspective and a little depressing, but, as always, saved by a few small moments: Van Gogh self-portraits, a few good friends, a decent pool shot here and there, and Sigourney Weaver\'s butt-crack(seen the last scene of Alien lately?)', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[66] = new Array('2005.11.14', '\"When I begin to write a poem...I seem to be harking after something to the right, just at the back of my head...So I cast about - always with two or more words at a time, because what I am seeking to hear is a stretch of language running like a blade along the grain of what remains hidden.\"
---Anne Cluysenaar', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[67] = new Array('2005.11.16', 'Coincidence...or conspiracy?
a) Dreaming of taking a writing workshop from Haruki Murakami where he tells me to write about the Armenian genocide.
b)Randomly turning on the Jackie Chan animated action show which hinges around a sheep that astral projects...', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[68] = new Array('2005.11.18', 'Today, sleep deprived, I got off my bike, didn\'t lock the bike, left the keys in the bike on a major street. Four hours later, they were still there.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[69] = new Array('2005.11.20', 'The reading went really well. It was pretty crowded at the Sugar Factory, and I thinkeverything went well. As performers know, it\'s always amazing to see what last minute things can throw you sideways---for me, it was something as simple as the angle of my paper that made me slightly uncomfortable. More importantly, I was so happy with the story, so I walk away please.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[70] = new Array('2005.11.25', 'Home now, after the second of two thanksgivings. And I have to say it was really fun to have Thanksgiving in Holland, slightly displaced, with Gina\'s kids reading about Puritan origins in Leiden, and the new cable station playing two-days old American football(on mute), all that was missing was Durkee\'s fried onions that Mom used to put on top of the green bean casserole. So many thanks to Mike and Rhea and Gina and Roland for their hospitality
And what was also great: listening to Arnout and Maaike get into a discussion of Jonathan Safran Foer. Quirky American books always are received differently in Europe, the same way that people don\'t get all of the Simpsons jokes. But darn, people read!
Side note: I hear that in some of the new cars, they will use the voice of Homer Simpson to give you driving directions.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[71] = new Array('2005.11.26', 'Watching BBC\'s show Dreamscapes, which is about architecture. They did Brasilia, Helsinki, Casablanca. I was really amazed at Brasilia, which I had thought was an Irvine-like planned city, but they basically put this one guy in charge of it, Oscar Niemeyer who did some amazing stuff. Check it out...', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[72] = new Array('2005.11.28', 'The zombie short story is now online.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[73] = new Array('2005.12.02', 'I\'ve been thinking lately about whether one can trust childhood icons, the things that make us feel homey and sweet. First someone was telling me about the Flavorists, from the Fast Food Nation book, that are basically designed to brand us from a young age with fake smells. And now, here\'s an article on the politics of The Chronicles of Narnia. ', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[74] = new Array('2005.12.03', 'Is it coincidence that records played backwards, otherwise known as satan music, sound like russian? If it wasn\'t for the Cold War, might backwards music sound like, well, Farsi?', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[75] = new Array('2005.12.06', 'A Sinterklaas poem written to Laura by one of her students:
Vandaag ben ik jarig, ik moet hier nu zijn
Dat komt goed uit, mijn Laura klein.
Ik heb het gehoord, ik heb het gezien
Jij kunt klarinet spelen voor tien!
Op mijn verjaardag deel ik graag uit de zak
Luister naar liedjes, loop met mijn paard op het dak.
Voor jou heb ik pepernoten en een chocoladeletter
Ik hoop dat het makes you feel better!
Sinterklaas
Translation:
Today is my birthday, I must be here now
That comes out good, my little Laura
I heard it, I saw it
You can play clarinet for ten!
On my birthday I hand out from the bag
Listen to songs, walk with my horse on the roof.
For you I have pepernoten and a chocolate letter L
I hope that makes you feel better!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[76] = new Array('2005.12.07', 'In front of the house this morning was a piece of paper ripped up from glue-I was amused at the brand name: Dr. Sludge. It is an evil looking guy with big white teeth and a blue face. Long live Dr. Sludge!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[77] = new Array('2005.12.08', 'I don\'t know if this has been reported widely, but Harold Pinter, this year\'s Nobel Prize winner in Literature, used his Nobel Prize speech this week to make some pretty feisty comments about the war. Read the speech...', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[78] = new Array('2005.12.10', 'Thanks to Chris C. for pointing out that Virgin Airlines has a Design The Best BarfBag Contest,', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[79] = new Array('2005.12.15', 'We had a wonderful weekend in Paris. We found the amazing Chinese restaurant called TCH\'A that we had been to six years ago, we had a fab time with Diarmid and Hoodles and Rascal, we got sick on starch. What more could one want? I also paid a visit to the incredible DADA exhibit at the Pompidoux, went to the 2nd story of the Eiffel Tower (and froze), and walked until my feet turned green.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[80] = new Array('2005.12.22', 'Good news! A travel/memoir piece of mine, Brewing Up Trouble In Pilsen, has been accepted for publication in Traveler\'s Tales: Prague, due out in March 2006. Get your copy now!', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[81] = new Array('2005.12.25', 'Another awesome jewish christmas, with lovely dim sum at namtin and an action movie.
I feel like I need to rant here. I chose to see King Kong, because jewish christmas says you have to watch an action movie, but it went against my intuition and my last year\'s resolution---that is, to boycott all SEQUELS and REMAKES.
King Kong was one of the worst, stupidest, most poorly controlled movies I have ever seen. Period. They didn\'t even bother with a consistency consultant---day and night were more or less interchangeable, and Naomi Watts(who I love) had cuts and bruises that appeared and disappeared from scene to scene. Of course this isn\'t why I disliked it so, it simply had no creativity (except for its special effects) and no vision. It couldn\'t even really articulate King Kong\'s original moral ground: that despite our technological/modern advances, we can\'t kill the beast. The joke is, time and time again, on us for spending money on cultural offerings that exhibit such contempt for our viewership. The joke is on us.
King Kong Syllogism:
a) If King Kong kicked the ass of 3 Godzillas, and
b) Godzilla could only be killed in New York by nuclear firepower, then
c) how could King Kong be killed by 6 biplanes?
This can only be explained as a sort of Victorian-era tuberculosis, that Kong must die for love, and, furthermore, die by swooning.', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[82] = new Array('2005.12.26', 'Very much amused by the fact that someone read one of my poems because it had the word Nymphette in it, and that they got to me via a google search for the word Nymphette, and that I figured out they were looking for porn. They were, I\'m sure, sorely disappointed..', '','', '');
arrBlogEntry[83] = new Array('2005.12.28', 'Gotta love BBC news, and how its harrrowing tale about the aftermath of Katrina was followed (seamlessly) by an equally harrowing tale of how a doughnut with the face of Mother Theresa was stolen from a museum.
A wonderful quote from a South African movie, Duma: Stupid boy with no ass---get out!', '','', '');